Confessions from a rapidly growing fat girl

Yesterday at church I wore a simple black dress that had ruffles down the front middle section. Naturally my stomach has continued to grow, but apparently the ruffles made me look significantly bigger. I had numerous people make comments and then were shocked to find I'm only 15 weeks! All I could do is laugh and say yea, I'm going to be huge. A thought that continues to freak me out. And the fact that my sister sends me pictures of her 2 friends who had twins with their freakishly large stomachs doesn't help. It is what it is though and there's no turning back now.

Its seriously laughable to see girls post pictures of their stomachs at 20 weeks and I look down at my growing bump and think I looked like them 10 weeks ago! I am accepting the fact that I will have stretch marks, that my stomach will be huge... along with other body parts, and that life as we know it will change dramatically. I thought that both excites and scares me at the same time.

All of these confessions to say, my quiet time this morning was no coincidence, "Do not worry about tomorrow." A reminder that we all know and struggle with at times. However it was the fact that this statement is not a suggestion, but a command that got to me. The same God that saw fit to bless us with 2 babies... (at the same time!)... is the same God who goes before and prepares our way. The same God who promises to never leave us. The same God who's grace is sufficient for me and who's power is made perfect in my weakness.

So I may be a rapidly growing fat girl with worries and fears, but I have a God who is bigger than both.

Earnestly

I will be the first to admit I do not have it all together. I am not perfect. In fact if I'm being honest I am down right lazy by nature... add 2 growing humans in my uterus and you can guess how productive I've been lately.

Living with an OCD husband has definitely challenged me in the area of tidiness... there is a difference in clean vs tidy. I assure you. And those of you who have followed me on here for a while know my struggle with putting away laundry. Thankfully I had a burst of energy recently and I'm happy to report that there is not a single item of clothing in or on top of my dryer. Mark it down... this may not happen again for a long time.

All of this honesty to say, my tendency for laziness also pours into other areas of my life including my time with the Lord. I've learned over the years how crucial this time is. I've seen it's effects in my life and know its essential. Lately the Lord has been showing me that yes, I may seek him daily, but am I earnestly seeking him. I was reading in Hebrews 11... the By Faith chapter.... which is always very convicting. Vs. 6 says, "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." I had to stop reading because it was as if the word earnestly was in big, bold, flashing lights. I know what earnestly means but I wanted to know more... I looked it up and this is how its defined:

1. Marked by or showing deep sincerity or seriousness: an earnest gesture of goodwill.

2. Of an important or weighty nature; grave.

3. With a purposeful or sincere intent: settled down to study in earnest for the examination.

4. Serious; determined:

Yes, I may seek the Lord daily, but am I seeking him purposefully and with sincere intent?

I've continued to have the phrase "earnestly seek Him" roll around in my brain and I can't help but think as believers what would happen if we all chose daily to not just seek him.... although many of just need to get started! But what would happen if we all began to earnestly seek him... with a serious, determined, deep sincerity? I know its kind of bold to say, but I'm pretty sure petty arguments would dissolve, families could be restored, and lives would be completely changed. Not because of anything we are doing but because when we earnestly seek the Lord our lives couldn't help but be transformed. Our desires become his desires. Our goal becomes Jesus.

So who's with me?! Its time to not only seek Him daily, but let's earnestly seek him!

Summer Update

Our summer is flying by! This past January, I agreed to keep 3 very sweet little girls this summer. This was well before I was pregnant... and with twins. I had such great plans of fun activities scheduled for each week. Then I discovered how it feels to grow 2 people.... I could barely get off the couch. I knew pregnancy brought on a level of tiredness, but I had no idea. Unfortunately those first few weeks with the girls were also consumed with an extremely sensitive nose that made me gag often and waves of nausea throughout the day. Needless to say, I am grateful that these girls are precious and play well together without needing my constant attention.

June 9-15 we went to Panama City with our students for camp. This was a different camp experience for me for sure. I was trying to stay rested and hydrated... all the while being exhausted no matter how much rest I got. Every morning, when our students would go to their bible study/rec groups, D would have a leader meeting/devo time with our adults in one of our rooms. I don't think I successfully stayed awake for a whole meeting. Thankfully I feel that stage is behind me.

We had a great week at camp with 1 salvation and several sincerely desiring to go deeper in their walks with Christ. This week was bitter sweet. I kept thinking this time next year I'm going to have 2 6month olds... and we'll probably be in a condo next door so my role as a camp leader will def be different.

The week after camp, we had a dr.'s appointment where we go to see our 2 sweet babies once again. I posted the up to date picture in my last post. I will be getting an ultrasound every month so we'll really get to see how they develop over the next few months. When I hit 11 weeks, my nausea began to go away and I seemed to have gained more energy. Don't get me wrong, I can take a nap any time any where, but I feel up to so much more than before.

Here's a pic of me at 11 weeks after our doctors appointment:


I know these kids are Daniel Jerkins' because I am thoroughly enjoying some of his favorite things that are normally not really on my radar: choc milk, ice cream, and candy.

 Last week, we went to Greers Ferry Lake with Daniel's family for our annual vaca. Like camp, this was a very different experience than what I'm use to. The doctor said I could get on the boat as long as the water was smooth. I went out for 10 minutes the first day and was so paranoid he looked at me and said, "Do you want us to take you back to the house?" I of course said, "Yes!" So the rest of my week I spent reading lots of books, taking naps and laying out. It was a very different lake trip for me, but very relaxing. I kept telling myself to enjoy it because next year wrestling 2 6 month olds at the lake won't be so relaxing.

Now we are back to the real world with no other vacations planned until September. Kind of depressing but it gives me time to use my new found energy to do laundry and clean my house and all the things my sweet husband has taken over since these 2 precious little ones sucked all my energy.

Here's my 12 week photo:

I have really been loving lemon flavored things this week. My favorites this past week were a lemon cupcake and lemon heads candy.

Normally I get really sad when we hit July because I know school is just around the corner. Thankfully my budget genius husband handles our money so well that he has worked it so that I do not have to go back to work in the fall. I am so thankful for the opportunity to be able to stay home and raise our precious babies.

Here's to hoping for a fun, healthy, energy filled 2nd trimester and rest of the summer!

1+1= 4

We knew we were ready for a baby Jerkins, but we had no idea what God had in store for us. April 29th I had gone to the doctor for some other issues and they did blood work to see if that would give them more insight. 30 minutes later we heard, "Congratulations, you're pregnant!" We were not anticipating that kind of news but we were elated. I'm pretty sure there was laughing and crying at the same time.

Several weeks later we went in for our first ultrasound. I knew something was up when our ultrasound tech had a huge smile on her face. Then she showed us this.

 We were in shock, but thrilled. 2 at once?! I looked at d and said, "Are you ready for this?!" I've never seen him so happy.

After several weeks of being in complete shock that I have 2 babies growing in my uterus, I think I've come to accept it. I go from... thrilled and freaked out and happy and scared and absolutely overjoyed numerous times a day. That may be a bit dramatic. I know those were  my reactions at first. Now I stay around thrilled and have to fight the worry/fear of a first time mom.

At our last doctor's visit, instead of 2 blobs with flickering heart beats, we saw these 2 sweet babies!

My official due date is January 8, but the doctor told us to expect early to mid December. Thank you to everyone who has texted, called, fb messaged etc. Your love and support has made this time so exciting. Please pray that our sweet babies would continue to grow and develop properly. Pray for a healthy/safe pregnancy and delivery. Pray that these sweet babies would have a heart for Jesus and come to know Him at an early age.

  
We are so undeserving of these 2 precious gifts, but so thankful for the Lord's goodness to us!

April 26

I can not believe that its already April 26. And by that statement I mean that it feels like we just celebrated Christmas, but I am also thrilled that there are 20 something-ish days left of school. My teacher's heart is jumping for joy.

This spring has been a whirlwind of ballgames and sicknesses for us. There has been a lot of clean eating experiementing and a lot of fun, junk eating too. There has been a lot of family dinners and sweet conversations with friends. There has been lots of fat baby kissing and chasing down to lay kisses on my ever growing Foremans. Life has been sweet and full. Especially as we look back at the past year of tearful goodbyes and sweet hellos.

I have never cherished my husband more. I stand back and am amazed at his leadership, love and servants heart for me at home. It also thrills my heart to see him lead and thrive in ministry... what a sweet privilege I have to witness both.

This spring has been a reflective one. A reminder that I deserve none of God's goodness to me yet he continues to pour it on layer upon layer.

Chicago

April 6-9 was spent in Chicago. What a fun getaway this was. Julie and I left the boys at home and went to tag along on Papa John's business trip.

I had an excellent plane buddy. She shared her snacks and was quiet while I napped.

Our first stop was for some good Chicago pizza. Gino's east did not disappoint.

We also ate some other delicious food...

Cheesecake Factory

 Garrett's Popcorn... one of Oprah's favorite things. Their caramel is the best.



RPM- Guiliana and Bill's restaurant

 

 

 American Girl Tea Room

We also visited lots of fun places:

Navy Pier

 

 John Hancock building

American Girl

 

Louis Vuitton
This little gem was $4,000.

 

 Walking in stores we could never really shop in was quite fun.

Through all the eating and shopping, we even fit in a few naps. One afternoon I couldn't figure out why I was so uncomfortable. Then I realized it was because I had a Hallie Claire in my back.

 

As we were riding up the escalator one day, I couldn't get over how big these 2 are.

 

That Mags... with her purse full of who knows what, wanting to wear make-up and do what the big girls do... and taking duck face pictures of herself. 

 I mean where did that cute little, scrawny baby in that awful leopard swimsuit that aunt candy bought her go?

And then there's Miss Independent, Lily Grace, who is opinionated and knows what she wants.

I couldn't believe I was looking at an almost 8 and 6 year old... well almost 8 and 6 but going on 18 and 16.

I always have such a great time getting away for a few days,but making sweet memories with these kiddos is what makes these trips fun.

7 Day Challenge

I have a love/hate relationship with Allie Johnson. She has been my running/workout buddy for the last 2 years. And by hate... I mean she pushes me... hard... and sometimes I don't like it at first, but am always grateful for the way she challenges me. Last Wednesday was no different when she sent me a text talking about this 7 day challenge she was doing. I of course couldn't let her do it alone so began the "hate" part...7 days of:

400 jumping jacks
300 squats
200 sit ups
100 push ups

Everyday.

I have been pleasantly surprised by how much I have enjoyed this workout. I love how its a great whole body workout plus we're getting in cardio and strength. It becomes a little monotonous at times, but overall is a great workout. We broke it down into 4 sets and adjusted from there. We found we were actually adding more exercises than what was expected but enjoying it too much not to. For example, here is one set:

100 jumping jacks
100 squats
100 sit ups (we do a variety of crunches)
30 push ups

If we were to repeat this 4 times we'd def get in the 400 required jumping jacks, but also have increased the squat, sit ups, and push ups... score.

I will say I have noticed, as I did when we were running  longer distances, how much we are affected by the food we eat. After eating all of our Easter family dinners on Sunday... which were all delicious but not necessarily nutritious, I found our workout on Monday to be much more difficult. I love though that our bodies tell us when we're eating crap. It challenges me to be more mindful of what I eat.... because I do not want to see it again.

An added bonus is we've seen a difference in strength, stamina and our bodies these past 6 days. With just one more day of the challenge, I was getting kind of bummed... that is until she started sending me new challenge ideas and then I remembered why I have a love/hate relationship with her.