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Sinner saved by grace. Wife to a cute preacher. Momma to 2 precious baby boys. Blessed beyond measure. And I deserve none of it.

Blog Archive

Saturday, December 28, 2013

1 week old= First Christmas

The boys were very excited that their 1 week birthday fell on Christmas. Due to me being a paranoid first time mom and their dr.'s orders, Christmas was a little different this year. We didnt even get to see my family bc they were passing around a virus. As disappoiting as it was to not see my family, we had a sweet Christmas with the Jerkins' and then just us as a new family of 4. 

Next christmas will def be crazier as we chase around two 1 year olds!

Friday, December 27, 2013

Twin Update: 37 weeks- December 18, 2013

37 weeks:

Wednesday, December 18 was not only my 37 week marker, but also what I was hoping to be my last dr.'s appointment. My appointment was set for 9:30a.m. The 2 days prior I had been cleaning the whole house, doing laundry, pushing on what were suppose to be pressure points to induce labor and still... the babies were in tact. We and so many prayed them to stay put and now I thought we were for sure going to have to pray them out!

8:00a.m.- I got up with my enormous belly and prepared for my appointment.
9:00a.m.- We walked out the door with hospital bags hopeful she'd send us straight to the hospital. (Remember the week prior I was 90% effaced and 2-3cm dialated while still on my meds. Now that I was off my meds and having tons of contractions (none of which were close enough together) and working myself to death I thought, surely I have progressed a ton!

9:30ish-Ultrasound- boys looked great but would not allow our sweet tech to see them flex in certain ways. This made their bio profile score not as acceptable as they'd like to see so they hooked me up to a heart/contraction monitor. Boys hearts were great and I was having several contractions.

10:00ish- Dr. came in and checked my progress on the monitor. She asked if I had eaten breakfast... duh... Of course I had. I don't miss meals especially while growing 2 people... I am always hungry. I told her I had and she said, "well shucks, if you hadn't I could have done your c-section at noon."


Probably the only time I have ever regretted eating a meal! 

She checked me and I had not progressed anymore since the last week. Are you kidding me?! So that was not working in my favor... but the lack of complete info from the bio profile had my dr. a bit concerned. She stepped out of the room and spoke with another dr. I tried not to get my hopes up. I was only 37 weeks and knew she wouldn't take them until 38 weeks.... unless there was reason for concern. Though I wanted healthy babies I was okay with her being overcautious and taking them early.

She stepped back in the room and said, "how does 4:00p.m. sound?"

I just about fell off the table.

I said, "4:00p.m. today?!"

She said, "yep. Go home get your stuff and be at the hospital at 2:00." I was in disbelief. We were going to meet our boys today!

I think we both walked out of there on a cloud. By then it was after 12:00pm. We hurried home, showered and made sure we had everything we needed. An hour and a half later we walked out of the door for the last time as a family of 2 knowing that when we walked back in those doors we'd have 2 precious boys with us. What a surreal moment.

After getting checked in and hearing the details of what was specifically fixing to happen, I still couldn't believe after all this time of bed rest and dr.'s appointments.... the boys were coming... today. 

I kissed d as they wheeled me to the surgery room. (It was nothing like I had imagined it to look.) The spinal they gave me was a piece of cake. As my lower body became more and more numb I knew it was just a matter of minutes. The drape in front of my face went up and in came d suited up and he sat next to my head. The fantastic anesthesiologist was on my other side constantly checking on me. In what seemed like no time I heard the dr. say, "Dad, here comes the first baby." He stood to video it. I heard sweet Jude cry for the first time and I lost it. It was happening. My babies were being born. The dr. asked d what his name was. As D barely choked out a response, I knew he too was feeling what I was... God's undeserving goodness and faithfulness being poured out on us in that surgery room.

In what seemed like 2.2 seconds later I heard, "Dad, here comes the other one." Then I heard a second cry that also stole my heart. Not only did I have one precious boy but now two. Jude and Luke were here and healthy... born at 37 weeks and were perfect.

Jude Ryan Jerkins
5lbs 9oz

Luke David Jerkins
5lbs 7oz

D was over taking pictures and then coming back to me to show them to me. Then as if a switch was flipped I began to feel sick. I was warned that was a side affect. I couldn't throw up but sure felt like I could. My anesthesiologist quickly gave me meds and soon they did their job. I was wheeled to recovery while the boys went to the nursery to be checked and bathed. Once D made sure I was settled and ok he then went to introduce our families to the boys.

As the meds, began wearing off, I was then wheeled up to our room. This was when the reality of surgery smacked me across the face or rather across the abdomen. I was somehow suppose to move my still numb self from one bed to another. As I proceeded to attempt to move, excruciating pain sored through my gut. It was seriously as if someone was stabbing me with a knife. My not so compassionate nurse assured me I had to move and that I should do so quickly. I could have slapped her. I was sobbing from the pain but finally made it onto my bed. Poor d was helpless to do anything but comfort me once I finally got settled. Oxycodone and Diladin were not touching my pain. Finally I got a Percocet and it changed my life. Finally at 12:30a.m. I was up to seeing my boys.

As they were wheeled in I couldn't believe it. They were mine. I was soon looking into the 2 faces that had grown, kicked, and flipped inside of me. I was in love. No one adequately prepares you for the love that you feel for a person(s) that you've known for so little time. 

The next few days were some of the sweetest of my life. Watching the man I love hold and take care of my 2 newest loves... indescribable. 

Welcome to our world, Jude and Luke!

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Twin Update: 36 weeks

36 weeks:

Cravings: sandwiches, nutrigrain bars, oreos/milk, choc milk... and it paid off because the scale read 200.2lbs. 

After a much disappointing dr.'s visit last week... where I was told to stay on bed rest yet another week, I was trying to not get my hopes up for this week. It was not in the least bit disappointing though!!!

The most exciting things:
-I can now ease off bed rest
-I can take my last pill Sunday night
-My c-section is scheduled

Now let me explain... 

1. Easing off bed rest means "easing." I will hang low all weekend doing some minor things and then really start doing things next week. This was per dr.'s request because she's going out of town this weekend and wants me to wait until she gets back. So starting Monday it's Operation Get These Boys Out! First on the list... go get my nails done! My precious nail lady has been coming to my house once a month and doing my finger nails and painting my toes, but I am so looking forward to sitting in that pedicure chair!!!

2. I have been on a pill called Procardia since September that I take 3 times a day to keep my contractions at bay. It ultimately is suppose to relax my uterus. She said I can take my last one Sunday night.... so contractions will probably really start on Monday. I told D it's kind of scary because that pill has been such an essential part of my life and the health of our babies! I guess its more confirmation of God's protection and grace that the medicine worked and now our babies are healthy enough to be born.

3. We spent most of the time talking about scheduling my c-section. She said she never expected us to make it this far so she never thought to schedule it. Now those days after Christmas are crazy booked. If the boys don't come on their own by Christmas Day... which is exactly 38 weeks for me... then we're looking at doing the c-section Saturday morning, December 28. She said they'd call us to confirm the day and time for sure after they worked through the kinks with the hospital. However she doesn't think we'll need that day b/c....

I'm 3cm dialated, 90% effaced, easing off bed rest and stopping my medicine. That combination most likely means we could have the boys next week! Now watch.... these boys scared us thinking they were coming at 25 weeks and now they may be stubborn and we have to go dig the little chunks out after Christmas! Hopefully not... we would love to have them and be home for Christmas.

Please pray for us as we eagerly await these precious boys and transition into a family of 4!

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Riley Paige turns 1

Yesterday this sweet baby girl turned one. 

She has brought so much joy and laughter to our lives. She is quite the little ham. She has more personality than most grown ups. I've never seen a child with so many facial expressions. She is such a happy baby. Her sweet, wrinkled nose smile can make even the biggest scrooge smile back.

Riley Paige I can't believe you've been in our lives for a whole year already. I love you more than you'll ever know... Even though you clearly can say Daniel's name and not mine. I love how you when asked where the the boys are immediately pat my big belly. I can't wait to watch you boss them around.

Happy 1st birthday sweet girl!

Friday, December 6, 2013

Twin Update: 35 weeks

35 weeks:

Cravings: bologna and cheese sandwiches, pancake on a stick, choc milk, little debbie christmas tree brownies... and believe it or not I gained no weight this week. I am shocked. 

Oh by the way I weigh 195 currently. This is so funny to me. I'm secretly hoping to cross over 200lbs just so I can say at one time I weighed that much. Is that sick and twisted? I blame the boys for taking over my brain cells.

Yesterday we went for our 35 week dr.'s appointment. I must say it was quite disappointing. Boys are doing great. However the exciting news we got last week about easing off of medicine and bed rest this week, came to a screeching hault due to me having more intense contractions here recently. So what that means now is I will continue my meds until 37 weeks and ease off of bed rest next week. Though my doctor doesn't think we'll make it that long because...I'm already 1.5-2cm dialated and 80-90% effaced... another reason for bed rest another week. 

Jude is weighing 4.8lbs
Luke is weighing 5.8lbs

So our goal is to fatten these boys up and make it another week... preferrably. Selfishly I want to see their sweet faces sooner than later, but then again I don't want to brave winterstorm 2013!

Friday, November 29, 2013

2013 Thanksgiving

I thought it was only appropriate to document not only our last Thanksgiving as just the 2 of us, but to also document the size of my ever growing belly, swelling face, and even bigger nose.

We did venture out of the house and attended both family gatherings. Don't worry Dr. Daniel made sure I was in a recliner with my feet up and that I had a full glass of water at all times. I was surprised that I actually ate less than I normally would on Thanksgiving... prob because theres less room in there, but boy did I still enjoy every bite. It was also so nice to get to hang out with family all day in another location besides my bedroom.

I also found it humorous to look at Thanksgiving pics from last year. The pic on the left was taken after me, allie, and sara completed the turkey trot last year and the pic on the right was taken last night.

I love the difference... last night's picture looks like I ate last years Candace. 

Can't believe these sweet boys will be here soon and will only make next year's thanksgiving even sweeter.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Twin Update: 34 weeks

34 weeks:

Cravings: french toast, chicken fingers, oreos, chips/cheese dip... this may or may not be why I have gained 5 lbs in 6 days and why my nose is now ginormous.

We went to the dr. today and got another great report. Boys are both head down and active as ever. As my dr. was talking about being pleased with our progress, I couldn't help but think after being stuck in bed the last 8 weeks, we better be doing well! All jokes aside though bed rest, though not always fun, has clearly been well worth the sacrifice.

She then spoke some much anticipated words.... next week I get to stop my twice a day monitoring, stop taking my meds, and start easing off of bed rest! This is exciting... and scary. The realization of how close we are to meeting our boys becomes more real every day. And getting off of my meds and bed rest will only increase my chances of seeing them sooner. We are feeling so many emotions right now with that realization. The unknown of being parents to 2 babies is overwhelming and exciting... but we can't wait.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

You know you're on bed rest when...

-you can't wait to go and eat at a restaurant again... even if its just at a fast food place
-you are incredibly grateful for technology
-you dream about the day that you can comfortably roll over and sleep on your stomach
-you value your good mattress
-you walk down the stairs and realize you haven't done this in a week and while doing so realize you have to hold on tightly to the railing because you feel you could easily tumble forward
-exercise sounds like a foreign language
-showering wears you out afterwards
-you currently use 5 pillows and could easily use more
-you can't remember what its like to cross your legs or walk without waddling
-shopping with 2 crying infants sounds more exciting than laying in bed
-the idea of wearing normal clothes makes you want to cringe and you become even more thankful for yoga pants
-you look forward to cooking and cleaning... the laundry I don't miss.
-you are exhausted by the end of the day and you've done absolutely nothing
-text messages no matter the content make your day exciting
-putting new color sheets on the bed makes you feel like you're in a new place
-you understand the importance and appreciate meal sign ups for families and will now always sign up to help. What a blessing this has been for us!
-you realize it is possible to pee 50 times a day
-the most mesmerizingpart of your day is when you get up to go to the bathroom (which is quite often), and are shocked to see your reflection in the mirror... every time. This big belly is crazy... crazy cool, but still weird.
-you lay around so much you can now hear yourself snoring while you're asleep. I have never been much of a snorer... until I got pregnant. Now I wake myself up snoring and making weird noises.

I'm sure there are more, but for now these will give you some insight into how exciting bed rest is. :) Part 2 may come later.

Friday, November 22, 2013

Twin Update: 33 weeks

33 weeks:

Cravings: fruity pebble bars, pancake on a stick, mcrib, cake... trying to fatten these boys up or maybe just successfully fattening this momma up.

Went to the dr yesterday and saw 2 healthy baby boys. Again not super cooperative for pictures, but they did make sure we knew they were still boys!

At the dr. I noticed my at times puffy feet/ankles were crazy swollen. 

Dr. looked at them and checked for blood clots, but said they were normal especially since I'm carrying twins. By the time we were almost home I couldn't stop laughing when I looked at them because they were so Shrek like. 

Seriously weirds me out just looking at this picture! Once I got home and put them up they started looking better.

I am definitely getting tired of being cooped up in my bed. Last night we had girls and lady leaders from our youth group over for a pizza party so after we got home I stayed downstairs and that was such a nice change. It's always fun having visitors, but it was so good getting to see those sweet faces and catching up. 

Now I'm back in bed with a candle lit on the dresser in front of me so I can pretend its the fireplace on this cold, sleepy, rainy day. It's encouraging to think next week is Thanksgiving and then the next is the first of December... our goal. We are definitely in the home stretch. Soon enough we'll finally get to meet these sweet boys!

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Twin Update: 31 and 32 weeks

31 weeks:

Cravings: turkey/cheese toast, soup, brownie brittle

We made it to 32 weeks!

When I saw this picture after D took it, I thought Wow, there are def twins in there! Walking around... and by that I mean to and from the bathroom... I really feel good. Not so much like I'm carrying around a litter. Laying down however, I feel very much like a whale. Staying in a comfortable position gets more difficult everyday. And you can imagine how fun it is to try and roll over/adjust. As my skin is really stretching the stretch marks have found their way to my belly. I knew it was too naive to think I could be pregant with twins and make it throughout without stretch marks. With the stretching skin comes very itchy skin! I'm using lotions and bio oil but not really getting much relief... so if any of you have any great ideas or tricks... I'm all ears! 

Yesterday, we went to my ob. She was thrilled that we have made it 32 weeks. And was thrilled to see that my cervix is up to a 3 now... it had shortened to a 1.6 so the fact that its so much better has proven how effectctive bed rest has been for us. She said if we can just keep things calm for at least 2 more weeks we should be golden. If we make it to 36 weeks, she said I can even start slowly doing normal things... off of bed rest. If the babies don't come on their own, she won't deliver them before 38 weeks though. 38 weeks for me is Christmas Day. So I'm hoping these boys come on their own a couple weeks before. So if you see me out running, you'll know things are great and we're trying to get these boys out! Don't worry... daniel jerkins gave me a look of complete disapproval when I suggested that.

So... its looking like these boys will make it until December afterall. Let's just pray for their sake they stay put another 3-4 weeks. And  for their momma's sake let's pray they come before Christmas because if I feel like a beached whale now... I can only imagine what 38 weeks would be like.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Jude and Luke's Nursery

I knew I was going to be using the white furniture I had in my room growing up whether we had a boy or girl. So it was easy to nail down that we would need white cribs and the wall color would need to be a darker color. Because I thought from the beginning I was having boys, I had in mind what I wanted and that was navy walls. So then, I just needed to find bedding that I liked. I knew I didnt want a character type theme, but more of a pattern theme... or different patterns rather. I found nothing. I even had come to the conclusion that I would just need to have my bedding made, but after looking at lots of different material I still hadn't found exactly what I wanted. Actually, thats not true. I found something that I liked but we would be looking at $1500 or more once everything was made for both beds and matching curtains.... to which I decided with that price tag I didn't like it that much.

Then one day I found this bedding on sale online. It was so reasonable that we went ahead and bought it and figured if we got it and didn't like it we could still get something else. Once we put it in the cribs to check it out, I was sold. It was simple, it was boyish, it had different patterns, and I could still have my navy walls.

Thankfully we started on the nursery pretty soon after we found out the gender so I was still able to shop and get what I wanted for the room. And thankfully the room is not huge so it didn't take much to  complete it.

Its the first bedroom you see when you walk up our stairs. I still smile every time I see it. 


November is the month where everyone bombards facebook with something they are thankful for everyday. Don't get me wrong... I am very thankful for so many things, but don't find the need to put it on facebook.

As you know life for us has changed quite a bit the last couple of months. We are in uncharted territory and making the best out of a not so ideal situation. However the boys are doing great and staying put so its clearly all been worth it. Life for me has been made so much easier because of a few things. These in fact are worth sharing here on our blog. (warning: sappy words ahead)

Family: Our families have been wonderful. Offering to come clean, cook, keep me company, organize baby stuff.... we are so thankful that both families are here and so close and so willing to help.

Friends: Our friends have been precious. Meal after meal, phone calls, texts, visits... we have felt the love and support of the body of Christ for sure during this time.

Nurses/Doctors/Medicine: We are so thankful for the medical teams who have taken care of us during our pregnancy and especially during the craziness of preterm labor. Their patience, attention to detail and obviously their concern and care for us has made this experience so much less stressful. We know we are taken care of by ultimately the great Physician, but we are so thankful for the way He has used the nurses, doctors, and medicines these last couple of months.

Technology: D has always been interested in technology and the latest things that come out pertaining to it. I could care less. However.... I am so thankful for facetime, iphones, and ipads. These tools have kept me feeling in the loop with everthing going on outside of my home. I have been able to be apart of every sunday and wednesday night church service because of technology. This has been a huge blessing! I've been able to still be fed spiritually and also see sweet faces.

D: There are no words to adequately express how thankful I am for my husband. I knew I married the best, but through all of this I have seen even more how wonderful he is. He has been so selfless, patient, loving... all while cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, taking care of me and still working... and he does all of this without a single complaint. He has been my earthly rock. I didn't think it was possible to love him more... each day proves that statement wrong. I am so honored to be able to share this adventure of life with him.

Jesus: As I typed this it seemed like such a sunday school answer, but no thankful list would be complete without including The Giver of all good things. I am constantly amazed at his love and faithfulness. 


I've decided now after being in 2 different hospitals it doesn't matter what hospital you're in, but more importantly about the care you have while being there. The nurses make or break your experience. Thankfully for the most part we had fantastic nurses. Methodists nurses overall seemed to be younger, but just as qualfied.

We have now dealt with receptionists, case workers, triage nurses, L&D nurses, nurse educators, nurse practioners, neonatologists, OB doctors, and high risk doctors... we for the most part were pleased with all of them. It can be very overwhelming and sometimes scary especially when your babies are less than 30 weeks, but all of these people at both hospitals were gracious, truthful, and encouraging.

The only complaint we had came from our experience of when we got diverted from Baptist to Methodist Germantown. Obviously it is not Baptist's NICU fault that they were full, but having to switch to a hospital you are unfamiliar with was a little weird. We were use to walking in to Baptist's triage and in less than 5 minutes I was on a bed and hooked up to monitors plus they brought all the paperwork to me while I was on the bed getting my babies checked out. They have always been quick to take care of us. Not quite the same story at Methodist. We had to go to the hospital per our doctor's orders because I was having too many contractions that were picked up on our home monitoring system. Too many contractions plus an already shortened cervix could lead to more problems especially at 28 weeks.

Once in Methodist, we had to sit in the waiting area to be seen by the receptionist. After 15 minutes of waiting, she finally finished with the person in front of us and called us up. I sat in a chair there in front of her and filled out the paperwork. Then we had to go sit and wait even longer in the waiting area. 45 mintes to an hour from arriving we were finally in a room and getting hooked up to monitors that confirmed I was having contractions 3-4 minutes apart. Daniel Jerkins was not a happy camper. I'm sure there were other women who needed to take priority over me, but 45 min to an hour?! Thankfully the sweet nurses made up for the lack of immediate care.

Here are some random pictures we took in both hospitals...

These "boots" that aren't really boots massaged my legs to keep me from getting blood clots.

In the ante pardom wing, we got bigger rooms with a refrigerator.

And we got D hooked up with an extra long bed.

At Methodist, after the mag drip, I got to slowly eat again. Chicken broth, orange jello, and sprite never tasted so good!

When we got transferred from Methodist back to Baptist, the high risk dr. made me go by ambulance... which was ridiculous, but apparently funny.

D clearly followed right behind us. I think you can see my head in there leaning to look at him.

In Baptist triage, hooked up checking on those boys.

Poor D froze in the hospital. He kept a jacket on or a blanket on him at all times. I think we were waiting to go for an ultrasound here and he shared his blanket.

It pays to know the ultrasound tech.

When hooked up to monitors, I looked like an alien. I had 3 different monitor heads on. 1 for each baby and then 1 to monitor contractions.

Hands down, D's favorite part about Baptist Women's... their blue bell ice cream. 

We've clearly had our share of hospital time. We are so thankful for technology and medicine that have enabled us to continue to keep our boys cooking. We are also very appreciative of all the precious people who have taken care of us at both hospitals. 

Hopefully we won't have to walk back in one until it's time for the babies!